Herculatte, it's a thing. Or at least it should be.

In the previous post, I was harping on about London's coffee revolution. It comes as a disappointment then, that a recent trip to one of London's independent coffee stalwarts, Grind Coffee Bar (not to be confused with Shoreditch Grind). Grind has a new outpost in the epic temple of mammon that is Westfield in Stratford. Stratfield as I like to call it. The great thing about this is that I can be guaranteed to grab a fantastic coffee to see me off on my merry way to the land of Kent for a parental visit as it is a stone's throw from Stratford International Station where you can catch the high speed service and be in the depths of Kentish countryside in under an hour.

The particular Saturday of my visit, I was in a foul mood. I was very tired and very grumpy indeed, coffee was needed. The strongest coffee, the richest milkiest coffee, something that would really satisfy me and caffeine jolt me out of my grumpity grump. I had just the thing in mind, a Herculatte. Yes, the Classics geek in me enjoys the reference to the eponymous hero, Hercules, but I needed caffeine in Herculean proportions and little else would do. My discovery of the Herculatte occurred in Toronto last Autumn. It was a true beauty to behold after a horrible all-night bus ride from Montreal. It was early and after a particularly disastrous order in Starbucks proved that their stuff just wouldn't cut it, we consulted the trusty guide book and made a bee-line to The Moonbean Cafe around the corner from Kensington Market. What could be better a better caffeine jolt than a triple shot latte? It was some of the nicest coffee I've ever had, this lovely little cafe roasts their own and they know their stuff. After drinking it, I came back to life and was no longer the zombie-off-the-bus-from-outta-town.

So it was on this particular Saturday that Grind Coffee Bar was my salvation, they would surely understand my need!
I know what I want and when I'm grumpy, don't mess with me. Especially if I haven't had coffee and you're the person who I'm expecting to provide me with the coffee that I want. On the menu was a flat white. Perfect, they do it in large as well - brilliant. Most places will only do a flat white in small which is something to do with the quantities or maybe just trying to differentiate it from a latte. Grind however does serve a large flat white but only if you're staying in and not for take away which I just find pointless if they have the large takeaway cups. So, I asked for it. A herculatte. Ok, they probably wouldn't have known what that was so, I asked for a triple shot latte. But no. I was to be let down, they don't 'do' triple shots. To which I just frowned at the guy behind the till (like I said, I was grumpy).

"All our coffees are double shot" as though this would be enough and make it all ok.
"I know, I've had your coffee before. Can I have a triple shot latte?"
 "We don't do triple shots."
"Alright fine, I'll just have a normal flat white"
 "I'm sure you won't be disappointed"

Well, I was because I wasn't drinking a triple shot latte which is what I wanted! No, the flat white was seriously nice but what is more irritating is the cafe's inability to listen to the requests of the customer. It wasn't until after I had left that I realised I could have just bought a latte and added my own espresso shot but the cafe should have offered to do this. I realise it would have made my coffee more expensive but I had pounds in my purse for caffeine purchasing purposes. Even if they'd bothered to ask me why I needed three and not two shots, they might have realised that I'm not a luddite who thinks that the coffee at Grind is going to be weak, I was just in need of that level of jolt. It's a customer service thing. It's also a matter of  personal taste, I wanted everything that is a triple shot latte, the caffeine (did I mention that I needed caffeine?), the milky goodness, the coffee coffee taste. It also probably stems from too much time spent messing around with my own coffee machine and making really strong coffees.

Someone, anyone needs to start selling a Herculatte before I have to go back to Toronto and get one, but that would be an expensive cup of coffee.